Thursday, May 5, 2005

"How Prophetic..."

On Tuesday, I put up a short post stating how I thought it was going to be a shitty day; imagine my surprise at the number of times people came up to me that day and said how crappy their day was and that I should be a prophet. Hmmmm...if I could only be so lucky at lotto....

So I'm scheduled to fly home this weekend; back to the motherland that I affectionately call Cleveland, Ohio, for a memorial service. As a matter of fact, I am supposed to fly out tomorrow morning at 10am sometime. Here's the rub: as of today, I still haven't received my tickets yet. Now i'm getting a bit antsy for a number of reasons. I ordered my tickets through Orbitz. If anyone has had any experience w/Orbitz, they probably hate them as much as I do. For starters, they don't do e-tickets; they only issue paper tickets. Secondly, they "deliver" said tickets via Fed Ex (which whom I hate as well). Last time I used Orbitz, they delivered my tickets on the afternoon of my morning flight (hence I missed my flight). I went through hell in a handbasket to get my money back for those tickets after wringing an apology from them three months later. Now the only reason why I went through them again (i'm starting to believe against my better judgement) is b/c they offered such a good deal on a round-trip ticket to Cleveland, that I simply couldn't pass it up.... We'll see what happens.

Today is CINCO de MAYO. Oddly enough, it's also 5/5/05. A weird pheonomenon. I think if you are born on an odd date like today, you are blessed w/super powers or an odd number of limbs or something. In any case, I have to do a bit of running around today to get ready for our annual Cinco de Mayo party. Getting extra cases of Coronas chilled and ready for consumption. Making sure the staff is up and ready to please the masses, etc, etc, etc.. The weather is holding up nicely, so it should be a good night to "cha-cha-cha"...

QUICK TIDBITS: Apparently on Monday night, our favorite patron, MADAME YOU-KNOW-WHO was approached by the brother of one of our lunchtime regulars (I won't mention his name but he's well known in the Murray Hill neighborhood-almost godfather-like); he bought her a drink, struck up a conversation, etc.; in short, it looked like he was going to go for the home-run ball, when for whatever reason, he bailed on the MADAME. No need to worry about her; according to my moles, another drunken patron picked up the fumble and ran with it....and her, right out the door. Moles tell me that they could be seen outside within minutes of meeting each other, making out hot and heavy, hands every which way but loose.... and off they went.

HERE'S THE CLINCHER: The next day, yours truly was manning the day shift when the MADAME came in for dollar drafts. Now normally when the MADAME comes in, i'll acknowledge her and she'll give me her customary short hello, and proceed to stare off at the television in her usual catatonic state. However, this time when I asked her how she was doing, she caught me off guard by rattling off the events of her evening in a rather animated state. It seems that she left the bar with this guy (same guy I mentioned above, picking up the fumble). They ended up at the apartment of a friend of MR. FUMBLE, someplaace downtown, near Beth Israel hospital. Apparently, at this apartment, there was more drinking, "the smoking of the pot" (as she put it), which made her mind go "woo-woo-woo", and some pleasure of the flesh. (I can't make this stuff up). I asked her what time she got home, and she said about six or seven in the morning. She was rather matter-of-fact about the whole thing. And then, silence and back to her catatonic state. Bless her heart.

DON'T FORGET: Like I said above, today is Cinco de Mayo and we are having our annual CINCO de MAYO BASH. $3 Coronas, Margaritas, Sangrias, Jagermeister Shots, (from 5-9pm); then we get a visit from the Miller Lite girls and a $3 Miller Lite promo (9pm-11pm). Stop by and get your "cha-cha-cha" on.

NUFF SAID