Friday, April 6, 2007

A PAGE OUT OF "THE STEPFORD WIVES"?

Last night was one of those interesting nights where the women dominated the scene. Now as a general rule, Third and Long tends to get a lot of chicks early on in the evening and then the ratio between the men and women tend to tilt towards the guys as the night goes on. This is often due to sports telecasts that go late in the evening (at least that's my theory). Some of the regulars that tend to come late night often gripe about the place never having any chicks and when I explain that there were chicks there before, I'm often met with skepticism.

So imagine their surprise when some of the same regulars showed up to the bar in the early part of the night (for a change) and found the place teeming with chicks. They were like kids in Willie Wonka's Chocolate Factory. They couldn't believe their eyes when they saw how many chicks were at the bar and didn't quite know where to begin. It was funny to see their reactions. I would say that the ratio was easily 4-1, girls to guys. Always nice odds.

One particular moment that amused me was when a couple of the regulars strolled in. There were a group of chicks hanging out at the front of the bar, having their cosmos and chatting it up about nothing. As soon as these guys walked in, I noticed right away the chicks sizing them up and straining their necks to check out the goods. Subtle as a brick I tell ya. So within minutes, the boys found themselves chatting it up with the same group of girls.

On a side note: it's always interesting to watch the mating ritual take place between the male and female. I'm seriously thinking of doing a Discovery Channel Documentary on this phenomenon. It cracks me up to see the things that males/females do, all in the name of a hook up. Hilarious stuff.

Back to the story. So the guys are chatting it up with these girls and one chick in particular seemed especially interested in one of the regulars. She had a decent face, but a KILLER body; One of those bodies that screamed "TA-DOW!" She was doing a "full-court press" on my boy and he was totally into it, for a while at least. Eventually she got weird on him and he pulled back. After her friends left, she stuck around and continued to pursue him, as well as a few other guys. Interesting. This went on for about an hour or so.

Suddenly, as the regular found himself in a bit of a "liplock" with the same buxom chick, this older guy came into the bar; This guy was well-dressed, probably late thirties/early forties, stern looking fellow. He walked into the bar with a sense of purpose, no big deal. Or so I thought. I went back about my business and next thing you know, "SWOOSH!". The guy was storming out of the bar, with the buxom chick in tow. Turns out he was her boyfriend and he happened to walk in on her making out with our guy.

Next few minutes was sheer comedy as you saw the poor guy storming up and down 3rd Avenue, while the poor, helpless girlfriend running after him, trying to explain away the situation. Are you kidding me? Talk about having a set of balls on her! Good stuff.

The rest of the night was pretty good; lots of folks getting their drink on before departing for the Easter holiday. Many die-hard NY Rangers fans celebrating a playoff berth for their favorite team. A few more interesting patrons and of course, the night wouldn't be complete without yet another sighting of the MANHOLE COVER MAN, who put in an extended performance, much to the amazement of the patrons and myself.

As I mentioned before, it's EASTER WEEKEND, so we'll be open as normal on Friday and Saturday; however we will be CLOSED on Easter Sunday. We will be open as usual on Monday, April 9.

If you are going away this weekend, have a safe and happy Easter. If not, feel free to stop by. As they say in the old Motel 6 commercials, "We'll leave the lights on for ya".....


nuff said