Tuesday, December 30, 2008

THINGS DON'T ALWAYS GO ACCORDING TO PLAN.

Yesterday turned out to be more of an interesting day than I'd planned for. It actually started out on Sunday afternoon. I had a conversation with T-BILL about the holidays and the pitfalls of the diet during that time. He told me about some kind of solution that his brother took that helps to "clean you out" within a day of taking it. He couldn't quite remember the name of the solution but based on the description he gave me, I figured it out (Magnesium Citrate). I've taken this stuff in the past and believe me, this sucker works.

After work on Sunday, I stopped at Duane Reade and picked up a bottle of Magnesium Citrate since I had been under the weather the past few days and pretty blocked up during that time. I figured since my Monday schedule was pretty light, it would be as good a time as any to take care of business. So Monday morning I wake up bright and early, take the dosage of the "stuff" and go about my business. By lunchtime, the solution kicked in and off I went to the "Executive Washroom" to handle my business. Once I finished making the "brownies", things took an unexpected turn.

Due to an unforeseen scheduling snafu, I realized that there was no one available to work the day shift. So in a state of mild panic, I quickly got ready and made my way to the bar and opened up for the day, praying in the meantime that I didn't get hit with another wave of "brownie-making". Once I got settled at the bar, everything was okay, aside from some gradual stomach-churning that scared me from time to time.

To make matters worse, we got a major early hit for the "Recession Monday" drink special, which meant constant bending over to wash mugs and pouring beers; great for the bar, not so great for someone who was doing whatever it took to keep from shitting his pants. A herculean feat if I do say so myself. (I want to commend FIRE MARSHALL ED and FRENCHY for stepping in and saving the day, by the way).

Once I finally got off of my shift, I did a mild sprint back to the confines of the "Executive Washroom" and finished off what I started earlier in the day. What a relief.

Not your typical blog post I know, but like wrote in the blog entry title, every once in a while, things don't always go according to plan.

Speaking of "Recession Monday", I noticed throughout the course of the afternoon/evening a couple of things that as a bartender, annoys the shit out of me. For example:

*DO know what the drink specials are before you place your order. I'm going to assume that you are an educated individual who can read the NUMEROUS signs posted outside and inside the bar listing the specials. Nothing drives me nuts more than a moron who asks what the special is when it's hanging over my head.

*DO order all of your drinks at once. Trust me, we can handle multiple orders, even when the bar is busy. DON'T order one drink, wait for it to be made, then order something else. It wastes time for me and for the other customers who are waiting even longer for a drink, thanks to you.

*DO bring up your empty mugs. It allows us to get them clean and ready to pour faster and in turn, gets you your fresh beers that much faster. DON'T complain about having to wait for beers when you have a table full of empty mugs that you didn't think of bringing up with you when you placed your order of ten.

*DO understand that I can't always stop for casual conversations with you if I am knee-deep in mug orders, empty glasses and screaming patrons.

*DO the right thing and tip accordingly. If I am making the extra effort to accommodate your need to look like the "Big Spender" when you order 12 mugs of Bud Light, then back up your "Big Spender" look by leaving a tip. And for those of you who DON'T leave anything at all, trust me, we remember you and you'll realize that when you find yourself waiting extra long for a drink (wink, wink).

Okay, I'm done with my rant for the day. I have a lot to do and a New Year's Eve party to prepare for. Don't forget about tonight: DOLLAR DRAFT MADNESS is here, the last one for 2008! Featuring $1.00 Bud and Bud Light mugs ALL NIGHT LONG! And if it's anything like last night, it will be another busy night! See you then!



Nuff Said