11.13.2006

Monday, November 13, 2006

HAPPY TIMES ON A GLOOMY DAY

Sunday was one of those days where the weather was the dominant factor of the day. It was dark, rainy and gloomy for most of the day and it had a bit of an effect on our overall day. The crowd was smaller than normal due to this as well as the fact that the PHILADELPHIA/WASHINGTON game was on local TV (thanks FOX...grrrrr); which kept our legion of Eagles/Redskins fans away (we have a pretty large following for both teams). We were also missing some of the regulars such as NAPOLEON DYNAMITE (who was on a family trip), and ANGEL (who's pretty much dropped off the radar these days).

Even though we were lacking in sheer numbers, we weren't lacking in laughs and fun. The Sunday Brew Crew celebrated the birthday of MR. CHIPS, the NY Giants #1 fan. He was so prepared to get wasted that he brought with him a photocopy of directions to his apartment from the bar to give to the cab driver, in case he was too drunk to give it to the driver verbally.

THE REDSKINS' CHICKS showed up in full force to support their team and it's pretty safe to say that they have taken over the mantle of "queens" (ok, maybe princesses) of the Sunday Brew Crew. And those are big shoes to fill as the post was held firmly for years by the likes of HASH BROWNIE (we miss ya), ANGEL (where art thou?) and CRIMSON CAMEL TOE(ditto). The current crop may not be as wild and crazy as the former, but they are fun just the same.

MR. LOW-KEY was in rare form yesterday, enjoying cocktails with everyone and at one point, when one of the REDSKINS' CHICKS (MS. PH.D) had the hiccups, decided to dole out his own cure for her ailment by mooning her in full view of the bar. It was pretty disturbing to see a pair of white cheeks from my side of the bar. Needless to say, it didn't help with the hiccup problem.

STIFFLER made a brief appearance after a long weekend of boozing. He wasn't in the best of spirits as he had a weekend of losing teams (AUBURN, ATLANTA) that killed his mood to drink with the Crew. Most painful for him was the fact that ATLANTA lost to my team, A.K.A. America's Team (CLEVELAND), one of the worst teams in the league.

Finally, at the end of the night, there was a small group of people (five girls, one guy) hanging out at the front of the bar. They had been drinking steadily most of the night and after awhile, their group had dwindled to three. It was near closing time and I noticed that the guy and one of the girls went downstairs to the bathroom. No big deal. What seemed like hours later, neither one came back upstairs. The remaining girl was also "concerned" as she was ready to leave. So she goes downstairs and almost immediately comes right back up and says bluntly..."Um I gotta go", and proceeds to leave. So of course, I immediately know what's going on.

So I go downstairs and sure enough, the door to the ladies room is locked. I bang on the door with AUTHORITY and yell out, "BAR'S CLOSING IN FIVE MINUTES, LET'S GO!" I hear some rustling from the other side of the door and a meek voice replied "um... okay". The couple was obviously having a gynecological exam in the bathroom with out permission! WTF!

A few minutes later, they both come upstairs, both disheveled and embarrassed. The girl wouldn't even look me in the face and just walked out of the bar. The guy, just as embarrassed, apologized profusely and walked out as well, leaving a nice tip in the process. After locking the door, I go to clean up the bar. When I went downstairs, I took a look in the ladies room to see if there was any damage and when I opened the door, the stench almost knocked me on my ass! I don't know what kind of exam they were doing in there, but whatever they did, they stunk up the place like nobody's business. WTF!!!!

An interesting end to an interesting day. As always, if I've forgotten anything (and I always seem to do), fill us in here!


DOLLAR DRAFT MADNESS TONIGHT with $1 MUGS, Coors Light, Bud and Bud Light ALL NIGHT LONG!


NUFF SAID

1 comment:

Diarrhea of the Mouth said...

Ohh, not good about the smell. You know when B stinks up the bathroom there is a special spray I use to get rid of the smell. It's even labeled "B's Ass Spray". Maybe you should have a "After Sex Spray" in all the restrooms at your bar.